We all survived the termite tenting with incident. Well, all of us except for the termites. And the ants. And all the other uninvited critters living in the building. Gwen was very popular at her cat resort. She and Sophie haven’t fought since they’ve been home.

JMM doesn’t really start until tomorrow, and I suspect that I am already over it. Even worse, I worry that I will have yet another weekend of suboptimal recreational internet time, and I will not have a chance to debug the freakin’ build script for this blog. (Any errors you have been seeing are because I have been lovingly building and uploading the pages by hand, sometimes forgetting to set essential environment variables.)

Since it is supposed to be rainy again tomorrow morning, I will probably take the bus to JMM and not worry about what sort of bicycle parking there is at the convention center. (Meanwhile, I live in a neighborhood so twee that there is bicycle valet parking at the farmer’s market.)

Mostly imagined sessions at the Joint Math Meetings

  1. AMS Special Session on getting reimbursed for going to San Diego and signalling that you are a serious mathematician.

  2. MAA Panel on enforcing the norm that the way the in-group teaches is better than the way that you teach.

  3. SIAM is no longer a headline sponsor entirely imaginary contributed paper session on cranks talking about blockchain.

  4. MAA Contributed Paper Session on people from my demographic who are just a wee bit too excited about hexaflexagons.

  5. SIAM imaginary workshop on taking the ferry from the Convention Center over to Coronado and hunting Pokémon native to the Hoenn region.

  6. Redacted imaginary session on That’s Not Funny.

  7. AMS Invited Lecture on an inoffensive topic by an establishment figure.

  8. MAA reception for socially awkward mathematicians.

  9. Some other society’s poster session (AMS members’ badges will warn them if they get too close to the room where this is happening because posters are for scientists and children.).

  10. Evil publishers will give you candy.

Note that I am so soulless that I will eat candy from Elsevier.